C. O. A. S. (#4)

Who were you before you now?

I’ll tell you who I was. 
Last to raise my hand in class-
Things a ‘good girl’ does. 
I’d cry from every bully-
My eyes would trace the ground;
Carrying that stack of books-
Till someone knocked them down. 
I didn’t have real friends [at all]
And college never lasted-
4.5 GPA
But I guess I’ll keep on dancing? 💋


C. O. A. S. (#1)

At first-It was for revenge. 
I wanted him to pay. 
For all the lies and tears [and cries]
My lipstick’s red today. 💋
So here’s my little confession-
I get off on your dismay. 
Because as I spin upon this pole-
You couldn’t reach me anyway. 💋

Words of Hate (But Why?)

You break my heart-
So many times. 
I don’t know where to begin. 
Before we were “us,”
When I am ever sick-
I should have never let you in!🌒
Your words have numbed me. 
Sometimes; at least I’d like to think-
Until you break my heart again-
And my tears start to seep. 
The trust is now a question. 
A question to conditions. 
I cannot take the pain anymore-
Please tell me this isn’t remission. 
I believe everything you say. 
So is it trust? Or am I gullible?
But you tell me you can get away with anything..
So how do I know..?
Am I in trouble?
(Be still- broken heart. 
Be still- I wish.)
For the pain that sounds its aching call-
Is not worth it to live with. 
(I love you. 
I’ve loved you. 
I’ve been loving you. 
But I no longer feel your love.)
At the bottom of the bottle-
Where you left my heart. 
Along with the words that “numb.”
“You’re annoying.”
“I can’t stand you.”
“I wish I could just sleep.”
(“Get me this..get me that.”)
But you’re mine to keep!
“Really sick of your voice.”
“Get out. Don’t look at me!”
I speak—
“Give me a break.”
“I love you baby doll.”
(-But here are my words of hate. )